“You are so unbelievable! What was that again?!” Larry responded with heavy sarcasm. He raised his beer bottle in a tilted angle toward him with a facial expression that hinted an emergency psychological evaluation.
“First of all, a group of elephants does not go by the name pride. Secondly, most importantly actually, elephants use their trunks to take water…should I remind you Gwartz, they have no hooves and if they do they do not-I repeat, they do not gallop! Whatever you are taking you need to slow down before it translates you to the next life. Spot-check buddy!”
“There you go again chief judge!” Retorted a disgruntled Mcgwarthy.
“There you go with your endless boring discourses. Just like you chief, just like you! I take character assassination quite personal-that’s not information!” He spoke like one stuttering.
“My distinguished career precedes me in accolades,” he asserted, seething with fury.
“Something tells me you are masking fear in your deceptively courageous assault at me. My sixth instinct tells me you actually believe my story but before I go any further, let me state, I just came from a funeral!”
“What?!” A few heads turned around in curious motions.
Mcgwarthy raised his pointed index finger towards Larry in stern caution insistent on right of way.
“The seventh one I have attended in four days.”
“Oh really?!” A mean faced officer sited at the far left of the party shook violently in quiet laughter that threatened to burst his burly figure.
“All the deceased vanished under mysterious circumstances after addressing me with that same kind of tone you gave me a while back. It’s been two funerals a day and so if the consistency of the statistics is anything to go by, well, what more is there to say?!” He raised his shoulders clumsily before charging at Larry unexpectedly.
“I’m timing you in seconds chief. Believe me, that’s not a threat!” He escalated his index finger towards Larry.
The garrison exploded with laughter that took the expansive plains with thunderous impact. The widely spread out camp under the clear magnificent sunset sky was alive with merry. The prolonged New Year festivities were in top gear. The distant skyline sparkled with gold, illuminating the stunningly numerous tents dotting the expanse landscape in spectacle.
“Just take a look! See-left-right-front-back! Just take a look! If one had the entire year to do a head count, they would stand no chance at all. Not even the most remote of chance. Here’s to the indomitable raiding party. And to the loot!” He triumphantly raised his large brimming mug.
“To one long-merry-raidy life! Can you believe it? There’s no breaking camp til end month!” The jubilation soared up the skies with romp and pomp.
“Wow! You’re looking just fine raider boy!” Someone shouted back from a few meters away.
“The government pays you lots of money to feed us with useful intelligence Gwartz, not relics on dinosaurs and star wars!” Larry maintained his sustained onslaught.
May be there is such a place as the sixth sense, where elephants apparently drink water, especially when senses exceed not the count of five; A new world; When The Blazing Trail returns…
“I hear a sound. This ominous sound, like elephants drinking water! Trumpets, galloping, charioteers and wheels of fire!”
©The Blazing Trail 2013
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